This morning as I walked into a Starbucks I suddenly remembered a Will & Grace episode where Will asks Grace why the name "Patrice" is on the side of her coffee cup. She tells Will that that is her "coffee name".
So as I ordered my venti Cinnamon Dolce Latte (and I forgot to ask for decaf! drat!) I thought, how fun it might be to actually try this out. I thought of this too late, but next time I just might try it.
Has anyone ever said to you....you like this name, or that name? Usually people think a "Charles" or a "Melissa" has a certain appearance. This is usually based off of someone else they know with that name.
I think particularly in my elementary years I thought of what name I would have given myself. Although, I personally do not wish to have children, I have thought about what names I would give if I had them.
So, next time I order coffee I might try out names like, "Story", "Ever", "Morning", "Collette", or "Riley."
Or perhaps I'll try really cool "old lady" names like "Beatrice" or "Gertrude".
I think it'd be a fun way of playing "let's pretend." To walk out of the coffee shop with a different name written on the side of the coffee cup.
I searched on youtube and google video for the Will & Grace scene where Grace explains her coffee name but I couldn't find it. Instead I found one of "Jack's"(Sean Hayes) greatest moments on the show where he is hopped up on caffeinated coffee. It's only 45 seconds long and worth it! Enjoy!
While I appreciate the fact that the Dalai Lama values women and is not afraid to refer to himself as a feminist, there is something that I disagree with.
I do not think that women are more prone to compassion. I have heard the Dalai Lama make this statement in his speech a couple years ago when I viewed a video of his appearance at the 2006 Women's Conference in Long Beach, CA. before. I think that the notion that women are innately more compassionate is a generalization.
Dalai Lama speaks at 2006 Women's Conference in Long Beach, CA
I think many believe that compassion is a female trait or woman's work. We of course could spend much time discussing nature vs. nature. Just how much is innate and how much is socially constructed. My thought is that it is unfair to suggest that it is up to women to be compassionate.
At the 2006 Women's Conferance the Dalai Lama says that biologically women have greater potential to show compassion. To be honest I consider this a sexist idea. I do not think that the Dalai Lama means any harm. Just the opposite. I simply disagree with his view.
Professor and feminist author Bell Hooks wrote an incredible book called All About Love: New Visions (2001) that touches upon this very subject.
Here are some excerpts from the book..
"Women are not inherently more interested in or more able to love than are men. From girlhood on, we learn to be more enchanted with love. Since the business of loving came to be identified as woman's work, females have risen to the occasion and claimed love as our topic."
"Women who learn to love represent the greatest threat to the patriarchal status quo. By failing to love, women make it clear that it is more vital to their existence to have the approval and support of men than it is to love."
"As long as our culture devalues love, women will remain no more able to love than our male counterparts are."
"Positioned to be primary caregivers, women are often arrogant when it comes to matters of the heart. Believing in the mystification of our sexist social conditioning, which encourages us to assume we know how to love – as though desire and action were one and the same – we may suffer countless relational failures before we begin to think critically about the nature of love."
Yes, the Dalai Lama did not use the word love. I still think that the concept of compassion applies here.
Rather than men turning to women for more compassion, why not investigate one's own view on compassion and on its importance?
The Dalai Lama is known to be proactive in his advocacy of compassion but yet he states that women are more compassionate than he. I encourage anyone interested in this topic to ask themselves if they agree...and if so..why?
Below are pieces from an amazing eco artist named Nicole Dextras. All photos and descriptions are from her website.
Weedrobes Summer Weedrobes is a series of ephemeral sculptures linking our dysfunctional relationship to both our bodies and the environment. It points the concept of environmental art into the realm of the body as politic and the hegemony of the fashion industry.
These eco-wearables are made from live plant materials such as leaves, flowers and branches and their organic structure indicates a symbiotic relationship between the body and the land. They question our attitudes toward territorial dominance, societal status and sexual identity.
Sunday Best Laurel Leaves, Rosehips, Various Leaves and Thorns.
Detail
Hydrangea Tournure Hydrangea Flowers, Magnolia Leaves, Laurel Leaves, and Thorns
Detail
Crab Apple Gown Crab Apples, Kale Leaves, Thorns and Hemp Thread
Detail
Yucca Prom Dress Yucca Leaves and Flowers, Thorns
Detail
Cabbage Smock Red and Green Cabbages, Gunnera Leaves, Green Beans, and Thorns
Detail
Art Residences This series of cast ice installations was created during an art residency at the Banff Art Center during the winter of 2005 and 2006. Mathew Walker of the sculpture department assisted in designing the two large wooden moulds for the Uncover pieces. The ice works were left to follow their own course and melt over time.
Green Skirts Three silk skirts and fabric lengths frozen in shallow moulds and stood upright
Uncover Two large blocks of ice with dresses and text, approximately 72” x 48” x 12” each
Public Art
Mother Winter Willow sculpture created for the Winterruption Festival on Granville Island in January 2006. Now permanently installed in park on Granville Island
River Sprites Ice installation done along cross-country ski trail in Pemberton, BC in February 2006
The artist's biography directly from her website
Nicole Dextras graduated from the Emily Carr College of Art in 1986 in the interdisciplinary department. Her previous studies included dance, painting and graphic design at the Kootenay School of Art.
As a visual artist Ms. Dextras’ style is mixed media, incorporating photography and sculpture. The Rebecca Gallery in Toronto currently represents her and exhibits her work during the Contact Photo Festival. Past exhibitions of note include: Gallery Telpaz in Ottawa, Galerie Mistral in Montreal and The Canadian Craft Museum in Vancouver. She has received Grants from the Canada Council and BC Ministry of Culture.
Her photographs have been featured in several Canadian and American art publications including: PhotoEd magazine, Photo Media, CityArt and Event magazine. Previous notable publications include: Pottersfield Portfolio Magazine and The Women’s Day Book 2000. She has done numerous interviews for television and radio over the years, such as: VTV “Gabereau Live”, TV5 “Vision D’Amérique”, WTN “The Creators” and CBC Broadcast One, “Arts and Entertainment”.
Her art studio is located on Granville Island and she currently teaches part time through the Emily Carr Institute. She has been instrumental in founding two art organizations: the BC Book Arts Guild and the Artists and Artisans of Granville Island.
TO FIND MORE INFO ON NICOLE DEXTRUS visit her website nicoledextras.com
First I'd like to say that I am not in favor of the death penalty. I was not always so certain but I am at the point where I can say that it is inhumane.
Not all individuals sent to death are guilty and many are minorities. It is expensive and it stooping the level of a killer.
I'd like to say thank and give credit to Womanist Musings for providing an internet source that actually lists death row prisoners and their last words. The site is from the Texas Department of Criminal Justice.
Johnson, Johnny 02/12/2009:The Polunsky dungeon should be compared with the Death Row Community as existing not living. Why do I say this, the Death Row is full of isolated hearts and suppressed minds. We are filled with love looking for affection and a way to understand. I am a Death Row resident of the Polunsky dungeon. Why does my heart ache. We want pleasure love and satisfaction. It. The walls of darkness crushed in on me. Life without meaning is life without purpose. But the solace within the Polunsky dungeon, the unforgivesness within society, the church Pastors and Christians. It is terrifying. Does anyone care or who I am. Can you feel me people. The Polunsky dungeon is what I call the pit of hopelessness. The terrifying thing is the US is the only place, country that is the only civilized country that is free that says it will stop murder and enable justice. I ask each of you to lift up your voices to demand an end to the Death Penalty. If we live, we live to the Lord. If we die we die to the Lord. Christ rose again, in Jesus name. Bye Aunt Helen, Luise, Joanna and to all the rest of y’all. You may proceed Warden. (began singing)
Scheanette, Dale Devon February 10, 2009 :Is the mic on? My only statement is that no cases have ever tried have been error free. Those are my words. No cases are error free. You may proceed Warden.
Davis, Larry July 31, 2008 :Blessed are they that mourn, for they shall be comforted. It is finished.
Chamberlain, Karl June 11, 2008:I want you all to know, everyone with all my heart, soul, mind and strength. Thank you for being here today to honour Falicia Prechtl, whom I didn't even know. To celebrate my death. My death began on August 2, 1991 and continued when I began to see the beautiful and innocent life that I had taken. I am so terribly sorry. I wish I could die more than once to tell you how sorry I am. I have said in interviews, if you want to hurt me and choke me, that's how terrible I felt before this crime. I am sorry, it is her innocence and her life which began the remorse every since December 1, 1991. I have embraced life. Thank you for being a part of my life. I love you. May God be with us all. May God have mercy on us all. I am ready. Please do not hate anybody because.......(end of statement)
Pippin, Roy March 29, 2007:Yes sir, I charge the people of the jury. Trial Judge, the Prosecutor that cheated to get this conviction. I charge each and every one of you with the murder of an innocent man. All the way to the CCA, Federal Court, 5th Circuit and Supreme Court. You will answer to your Maker when God has found out that you executed an innocent man. May God have mercy on you.
My love to my son, my daughter, Nancy, Kathy, Randy, and my future grandchildren. I ask for forgiveness for all of the poison that I brought into the US, the country I love. Please forgive me for my sins. If my murder makes it easier for everyone else let the forgiveness please be a part of the healing. Go ahead Warden, murder me. Jesus take me home.
Charles Nealy March 20, 2007:The reason it took them so long is because they couldn't find a vein. You know how I hate needles - I used to stay in the Doctor's Office. Tell the guys on Death Row that I'm not wearing a diaper. I can't think of anything else. You all stay strong. Now you can put this all aside. Don't bury me in the prison cemetery. Bury me right beside momma. Don't bury me to the left of dad, bury me on the right side of mom.
Kim Schaeffer, you are a evil woman. You broke the law. The judges and courts helped you and you didn't have all the facts. When you look at the video, you know you can't see anyone. You overplayed your hand looking for something against me and to cover it up the State is killing me. I'm not mad or bitter though. I'm sad that you are stuck here and have to go through all of this. I am going somewhere better. My time is up. Let me get ready to make my transition. Doug, don't forget Marcy.
Christopher Wright October 30, 2008: Yes I do. There has been a lot of confusion on who done this. I know you all want closure. Donna had her Christianity in tact when she died. She never went to a drug house. John Adams lied. He went to the police and told them a story. He made deals and sold stuff to keep from going to prison. I left the house, and I left him there. My only act or involvement was not telling on him. John Adams is the one that killed Donna Vick. I took a polygraph and passed. John Adams never volunteered to take one. I have done everything in my power. Donna Vick helped me; she took me off the street. I was a truck driver; my CDL was still active. Donna gave me everything I could ask for. I helped her around the yard. I helped her around the house. She asked if there were anyone else to help. I am a Christian myself, so I told her about John Adam. We picked him up at a dope house. I did not know he was a career criminal. When we got to the house he was jonesin for drugs. He has to go to Dallas. I was in the bathroom when he attacked. I am deaf in one ear and I thought the T.V. was up too loud. I ran in to the bedroom. By the time I came in, when I tried to help her, with first aid, it was too late. The veins were cut on her throat. He stabbed her in her heart, and that's what killed her. I told John Adams, "turn yourself in or hit the high road." I owed him a favor because he pulled someone off my back. I was in a fight downtown. Two or three days later he turned on me. I have done everything to prove my innocence. Before you is an innocent man. I love my famly. I'll be waiting on ya'll. I'm finished talking.
*** To anyone reading this, I encourage you to take a look at this website. Read their crimes, read their last statements and look into the faces of these individuals.
Are all those who insist that they are innocent, truly innocent? Doubtful. Are all death row prisoners remorseful? Probably not. Even so, I cannot support the death penalty as it is a system that is not always accurate.
I am aware than many supporters of the death penalty think that those who do not are crazy to show compassion to those who rape, kill and brutalize. However, it is not the crime that I sympathize with. I do not condone such evil. However, I do believe in rehabilitation. And if that is not an option for some, I think that prison is an adequate consequence. Yes, it costs money to fill prisons. It costs more to kill.
For those of you who haven't seen it, I recommend watching the film The Life of David Gale. It's a very powerful film starring Kevin Spacey and Kate Winslet. The film speaks to the issue of the death penalty.
The Life of David Gale - Trailer
I remember seeing this film in a movie theater with an old boyfriend. I will say that there is a scene that is difficult to watch. It is explicit but it also pulls at one's emotions. Tears welled up in my eyes and I distinctly remember my then boyfriend and I covering each other's eyes and holding each other in that moment.
I swore I would never watch this film again. Quite some time after the film was released I ended up purchasing the dvd. Why? Because the film provokes thought. The explicit scene doesn't strike me the way it did initially. Perhaps I am somewhat desensitized to it. Regardless the film is quite poignent.
There is a scene where actress Laura Linney plays a professor and activist agains the death penalty. Her character "Constance" gives a speech in which she says that once you sentence a person to death you also sentence yourself to bloodlust.
Imagine that you are a deathrow inmate who is scheduled to be executed. Imagine that you are innocent. Your choices are to die with fear and rage or to attempt to accept it and find some sort of peace. Imagine what that process must be like. Imagine giving a final statement and when finished...having to muster the courage to say "you may proceed warden."
He performs regularly as a spoken word artist and a comedian, and has written and published books of prose and poetry. Rollins is a radio and TV personality, actor, and voice-over artist. He's done several USO tours to Iraq since the war began.
Mother Jones recently spoke with Henry Rollins about his USO tours, punk rock, the newest season of his television show, and the art of storytelling.
Mother Jones: The first thing I wanted to ask you about was your USO tours. Can you tell me about how and why you got involved doing those tours?
Henry Rollins:I do it because that's my way of protesting the war, and it's my custodial duty to go behind this president that started this needless war that's hemorrhaging everything from needless lives to money and everything else. And the fact that the soldiers don't dictate policy; they just go and do what they are told, leads me to believe I don't really have a beef with the troops, I have a beef with the people who sent them into where they are deployed. So I go and I meet these people without any hesitation and I quite like them.
MJ: And can you tell me what your interactions with the troops are like?
HR:You meet them in hospitals, you meet them on the ground, in the mess hall, sometimes there's a meet and greet situation set up where you shake hands, tell stories, whatever. Sometimes you're just at dinner, kind of holding court. It's called a handshake tour, what I do. Sometimes they ask you to go up and speak for 20 or 30 minutes. I do all of that.
MJ: And is there anything that you've felt or seen during these tours to Iraq that you weren't prepared for?
HR:In parts of Iraq, when you go the motor pool, and you see vehicles that need to be repaired, and why they need to be repaired, like bullet clusters where the driver's head was, you know, thankfully it's bulletproof glass, or the sides of these vehicles looking like the biggest bullet possible just tore through it. And you realize someone tried to kill these guys. And that's pretty arresting.
MJ: Have these experiences changed the way you think about the war at all, having met so many people one on one, face to face?
HR:No. [The war] was a bad idea. It never was a good idea. It's an illegal war. We're not there for the purposes that George W. Bush says. He has a perfect situation there because if you leave it now, you leave these people who did not ask for your incursion; you leave these people in worse shape than when you got there. And so no, I don't think anything different about it, I just feel it more acutely, and at this point it's now more of a personal thing. I get letters from the wives saying my husband died. I get letters from the moms. I got a letter from one mom who wants me to write a letter to her son to try and talk him out of joining the Army. I get letters from wives who miss their husbands, moms what to tell me regretfully that their son, who loved my DVDs, and his friends, who all love my DVDs, and they all listen to my CDs out there, he died two days ago and she had to tell somebody. A guy who shot and killed a child mistakenly, he writes me and asks me to give him good reason why he shouldn't kill himself. These are the letters I get, and I get them pretty often. So this thing is a very personal experience for me. It's more than just something I see on the news.
MJ: A USA Today article I saw talked to Al Franken and other people who had done USO tours and they mentioned one occasion in which you kind of slipped and made some disparaging comments about Dick Cheney, and there was mixed reaction from troops. Is that difficult, to go and not let your ideas about the war come out?
HR:No. Because the war they are fighting and the war you speculate on from the safety of your home are two different things. There really is a disconnect. And so, I don't think it would be anything but deleterious to morale to go out there and say "this is a bogus war, man." Anything that could be deleterious or distracting to these people is not on.
MJ: One last question about the military; when you were younger, was the military ever something you considered?
HR:No.
MJ: Why not?
HR:I went to a military prep school for many years, and I graduated, and the last thing I wanted to do was be told to stand up. And I was into music. My father was Army, my step-brother was Navy, I come from Washington, D.C., and was surrounded by it, and never had any interest.
MJ: I'm glad you brought up music, because I wanted to shift gears and talk about music, specifically punk rock. Where do you think punk was able to succeed the most, and where do think punk failed the most?
HR: [Punk] gave music back to people. For a long time, when I was very young, I went to go see arena rock bands. I was 16 and it was all I could get in to see, legally. And I saw Led Zeppelin and Ted Nugent and Van Halen and all that. Me and [Minor Threat and Fugazi vocalist] Ian MacKaye would go to these concerts, and it was fun. You know, seeing Led Zeppelin did not suck, in the least. And then punk rock came along and all of a sudden you are standing five feet away from Dee Dee Ramone or the Bad Brains, or you're carrying in the gear with the band, or now you're in the band, and so music became this very immediate thing to me, where I could experience it from a very close-up vantage point instead of bringing binoculars, which I literally did to see Led Zeppelin. So I think it actualized music for a lot of young people. If you wrote the band, they would write back. You could meet the band. It became this thing that was a part of your life, not this thing that you paid a ticket for and through peanuts at. And that to me was huge. I think a lot of people became very inspired by that ethic of, you know, I'm gonna confront authority and really see what that's all about, and question authority, read between the lines, and be suspicious. And I never heard that in a Ted Nugent record.
Where did it fail? I don't know that it failed, I think it kind of just got absorbed into popular mainstream. When you hear a Stooges track or a Buzzcocks track or a Ramones track or a track by the Fall, or what have you, in a car ad, some people, whenever that happens, I get a letter saying "What a sellout." And I say "no man, we've arrived." The person making that ad grew up on that music. You're no longer confined to interstitial, instrumental music, you're gonna get Iggy Pop and the Teddy Bears singing I'm a punk rocker to sell a car. What would you rather hear? Some wanky keyboard or Iggy and the Teddy Bears? I know which one I'd rather hear, and I just hope they get paid quickly and double scale, because it's about time. I don't so much see the failure in as much as that anything that has been around for 30 years or more.
MJ: It's been an interesting trajectory to see you go from this kid from DC with long hair to this multimedia punk rocker who hangs out at William Shatner's house from time to time.
HR:Yeah, it's been an interesting ride. That's why I try to document it, because it does make for a good story, that's undeniable. And what do I think of it? Well, it's my life. And when you get a certain grip on it and you start doing what you want to do, that's a very powerful thing, and you start to see that a lot of people don't ever get their grip on that particular set of handle bars. There's a lot of mountain climbers trapped inside of bodies of people behind the counter at Kinko's.
MJ: You've done two seasons of The Henry Rollins Show on the Independent Film Channel, where you interview artists and invite bands to play. IFC seems to have given you complete freedom to do whatever you want on the show.
HR:Yeah, I think I called Karl Rove "Baby Huey Fat Fuck." Yeah, I did that.
MJ: You're definitely taking that freedom and running with it. You're not afraid of dropping curse words or words like "neo-conservative douche bag pundits." What's that like to have extreme freedom to do whatever you want?
HR:It's wonderful [laughs]. It's fantastic. And I love the hate mail I get, the unsigned, misspelled letters I get telling me to go back to Russia or wherever.
MJ: You also don't shy away from a gay joke here, or even poking fun at yourself quite a bit.
HR:Well you have to poke fun at yourself. But a "gay joke," now you have to be very careful there. When I say something that is "gay," you know [comedian] Jeneane Garofalo and I decided that we're taking 'gay' back. Where you can say "gay," or "that's pretty gay," and it's not a slight in any way, of anyone that is having a same-sex relationship. Because I have not one bit of homophobia in me. I mean, to me, I am in disbelief about how this country is just up in arms about same-sex unions. I mean they should just go and get a life and get on with themselves and not feel the need to stand outside of churches where two women are crazy enough to get married. To me, marriage is insane, but if two people want to do it, then as Americans, shouldn't you be saying "Yay, land of the free, home of the brave, and if two women want to get married, this is the perfect country for that kind of thing," because you couldn't really pull that off in Turkey or Saudi Arabia, without a little bit of turbulence. We shouldn't have that kind of thing here.
MJ: A few more things about the show I want to go back to. You did a funny piece on Wal-Mart that was animated. And if I'm not mistaken you called Wal-Mart the paradigm of capitalism. I'm just curious if you could elaborate a little bit.
HR:Yeah, it's getting things for cheap. And when you're in there and you're paying like $.40 for something or getting some Tylenol for like a dollar less, you buy it. But you also need to understand what it means long term. And it tests your mettle as an American. Like how much trade debt do you really want to hand off to your kids?
MJ: One interview I thought was interesting was with Marilyn Manson, and you had a chance to talk about Columbine. What do you think that incident says about this larger connection between pop culture and youth violence and the media?
HR:I exchanged letters with a survivor of Columbine who asked me what I thought of all of it. For me it was a responsibility issue. You know, my beef is with the parents. I mean, you don't know your kid is making a pipe bomb in your garage? Why don't you pull your head out of your ass and go be a dad or a mom and police that kid. If the kid is making a pipe bomb, why don't you know? Why do you have guns around the house? I'm not saying ban guns, but why are there guns around the house that the kid can take, and why don't you know they're gone?
MJ: You have your own publishing company, and you've put out other works from people like Nick Cave, but also a lot of your own stuff. Why did you get into writing, and what do you think your strongest skills are as a writer?
HR:I'm not a very good writer. I'm working at it. What I have is access. I go places. I can get in and out of places and come at it with my $3.50 an hour mindset. All my big heroes are literary, writers. I'd love to meet Jimmy Hendrix or John Coltrane, but I'd much rather meet Thomas Wolfe, or F. Scott Fitzgerald, or [Albert] Camus, or [Charles] Baudelaire, or what have you. Words and books have always meant a lot to me. That someone can take words and string them together to where they will move me is just a hell of a thing. It's amazing to me; more amazing to me than music or painting. It's always been the written word or the spoken word, like a great lecture or a great lyric, or a great poem. To me it's just amazing. And I always aspire toward capturing that, or my version of it.
MJ: I saw you once in Tallahassee, Florida, years ago, and I remember feeling very surprised, because I was expecting you to be pissed off and angry and irate, but you came out and were just making people laugh. And people were really laughing. It wasn't what I was expecting.
HR:Most experiences I have survived I am able to have some fun with. There's some things that aren't funny, but most of the time, just the fact that you crawled out with all digits intact, there's some humor in there. And the farther and wider I go it's kind of hard not to come back with a story.
*** I've been a fan of Black Flag and Henry Rollins' spoken word albums for years. I have all of his spoken word dvds and will continue to purchase them even though Rollins and I disagree on a few things here and there. And even though Rollins has a tendency to get a little too aggressive when he gets amped on up stage.
***
I wanted to pull up some video of Rollins speaking on one of his tours. But instead I am posting part of an episode of his Henry Rollins Show on IFC. Here is a 2007 interview with Arianna Huffington.
The Henry Rollins Show - Interview with Arianna Huffington (2007) Part 1
The Henry Rollins Show - Interview with Arianna Huffington (2007) Part 2
I believe story telling is an art form and blogging is a medium in which to share stories and ideas. Within this blog I hope to cover a spectrum of topics. From the serious to the silly. Here you will read my views and inquiries about subjects such as feminism, other various socio-political issues, psychology, spirituality, sexuality, and general interests such as film, art and music. You will also be exposed to my obsession with cupcakes, tea, books, Hello Kitty, and quirky day to day journeys. I enjoy learning from others as I am constantly attempting to introspect, grow and evolve. During this process I will be jotting down musings on this blog. Pull up a comfy chair and a spot of tea and join me!
