Dr. George Tiller gunned down...I hang my head low

On May 31st, 2009 abortion provider Dr. George Tiller was shot dead outside his Lutheran church in Wichita, Kansas. I know this is a topic that is travelling over fast speeds over the blogosphere. I suppose I feel that as a Christian feminist it is important for me to voice my opinion as well.

Dr. Tiller was a target for extreme pro-lifers as he not only performed abortions but performed late-term abortions. It is reported that in 1986 his clinic was bombed, in 1991 the clinic was blockaded for six weeks and in 1993 he was shot in both arms. Dr. Tiller faced many personal and legal battles which tells me that he believed very much in the job he was doing.

What breaks my heart is that there are many extremist citizens applauding the killer that gunned down Dr. Tiller and all the while referring to themselves as Christians. I am not sure what their logic is. My only guess is that they assume that even though the shooter committed murder of one man, a larger number of babies will be saved. I cannot speak for all who condone the murder of Dr. Tiller. I can only speculate that their anger blinded them.

Our current President has voiced his disgust with the actions of this shooter and has said "However profound our differences as Americans over difficult issues such as abortion, they cannot be resolved by heinous acts of violence."

During the President's election campaign he and Senator John McCain were invited to the Saddleback "mega church" by senior pastor and activist Rick Warren. Both men were interviewed separately by Warren. During Obama's interview he was asked for his opinion on abortion rights. At one point Obama responded by saying that although he is pro-choice that doesn't neccessarily mean that he is pro-abortion. I agree with his sentiments.

As a human being, as a woman, as a Christian and as a feminist I have battled this topic. It is not an easy one. I have known women who have undergone abortion procedures and let me tell you it is not a quick fix. There are consequences and potential for grief on both sides of the equation.

As much as I love children I do not want any of my own. If I were to become pregnant I would hope that I would have the courage to bear the child and give it up for adoption. But that is not an easy route to take. To put my body through the physical and emotional trials of pregnancy and labor. To marvel at what my body is capable of doing...holding a child, caring for a child and delivering it into life. But also to understand that the life inside me is not mine. There is indeed a danger of becoming attached to the life inside.

I would hope that I was giving the child to good parents. But as a clinical social worker who has a history of working with at risk youth, I can tell you that the foster care system is filled with neglected and abused children and teens.

I know women who have chosen to terminate their pregnancies. The aftermath is difficult to say the least. There is a mourning process. While every experience is different I do not see how a woman can undergo the process of adoption or abortion without being changed in some way.

I do feel that abortion is taking away life. I also recognizes however, that abortions can often save the life of the mother. I would hope that if abortion became illegal that women would not resort to the hanger or other primative methods. However, I believe that women would persue illegal abortions which may be unsafe.

My hope is that a choice for abortion would be a last resort for any mother. But I also recognize that the choice belongs to each mother. As a Christian I believe that God gave us free will. While I currently (I say currently because I am open to learning and perhaps my views will change in the future...who knows) I feel that abortion is taking a life, I also feel that extreme pro-lifers cannot force a woman into making her own choice.

I think what we need is focus on preventing unwanted pregnancies. Additionally, I think it is impotant for every woman to educate herself and fully weigh her options. I have no problem with pro-life camps and pro-choice camps attempting to educate the massess. My hope is that we can move forward without violence. Seems like such a simple notion...but ask anyone who loved and knew Dr. George Tiller...obviously it is not. May he rest.